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Fri, 18 April 2014 06:16:36 +0000
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Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.

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Fri, 18 April 2014 03:24:32 +0000
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My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn't take it out of my garden.

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Thu, 17 April 2014 14:33:35 +0000
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Every journalist has a novel in him, which is an excellent place for it.

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If quantum physics doesn't confuse you then you don't understand it.

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Wed, 16 April 2014 07:14:08 +0000
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I'm Jewish. I don't work out. If God had wanted us to bend over, He would have put diamonds on the floor.

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Louis Pasteur's theory of germs is ridiculous fiction.

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Tue, 15 April 2014 14:31:33 +0000
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Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them.

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Computers can figure out all kinds of problems, except the things in the world that just don't add up.

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Mon, 14 April 2014 23:06:08 +0000
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We had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture.

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Mon, 14 April 2014 22:29:39 +0000
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The longer I live the more I see that I am never wrong about anything, and that all the pains that I have so humbly taken to verify my notions have only wasted my time.

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